March 2017 My Subconscious Made Me Do It from You are a Bad Ass by Jen Sincero
“ ….It’s not your fault that you’re [messed] up. It’s your fault if you stay [messed] up, but the foundation of your [messedupedness] is something that’s been passed down through generations of your family, like a coat of arms or a killer cornbread recipe, or in my case, equating confrontation with heart failure. Here’s how it works: We as humans have a conscious mind and a subconscious mind. Most of us are only aware of our conscious minds, however, because that’s where we process all our information. It’s where we figure things out, judge, criticize, worry that our ears are too big, grasp that 2+2= 4, try to remember where the hell we left the car keys, etc. The conscious mind is like a relentless overachiever, incessantly spinning around from thought to thought, stopping only when we sleep, and then starting up again the second we open our eyes. Our conscious mind, otherwise known as our frontal lobe, doesn’t fully develop until sometime around puberty. Our subconscious mind, on the other hand, is the non-analytical part of our brain that’s fully developed the moment we arrive here on earth. It’s all about feelings and instincts and erupting into…temper tantrums in the middle of the supermarkets. It’s also where we store all the early, outside information we get. The subconscious mind believes everything because it has no filter. It doesn’t know the difference between what’s true and what’s not true. If our parents tell us that nobody in our family knows how to make money, we believe them. We believe them when they tell us that some fat guy in a red suit is going to climb down the chimney and brings up presents- why wouldn’t we believe any of the other garbage they feed us? Our subconscious mind is like a little kid who doesn’t know any better and it receives information when we’re little kids because the conscious mind hasn’t developed yet. We take in information via the words, smiles, frowns, heavy sighs, etc of the people surrounding us with zero ability to filter any of it, and it all gets lodged in our squishy little subconscious minds as the “truth” (otherwise known as our “beliefs”) where it lives, undisturbed and unanalyzed, until we’re on the therapy couch decades later or checking ourselves into rehab, again. I can pretty much guarantee that every time you tearfully ask yourself the question, “WTF is my problem?!” the answer lies in some lame, limiting, and false subconscious belief that you’ve been dragging around without even realizing it. There are tools to go much deeper into the subconscious beliefs and fix whatever ‘s blocking you from living the kind of life you’d love to live {like hypnosis}. For now, practice stepping aside and noticing what’s happening in the dysfunctional areas of your life and strengthen your almighty awareness muscles. Start waking up to the stories you’re working with in your subconscious (ie if I go on a diet I’ll never be able to eat anything fun again, etc). Because once you see what’s really going on, you can start to drag out the stinky carcasses of your limiting subconscious beliefs and give them the heave-ho, thereby opening up the space to invite the fresh, new, awesome beliefs and experiences that you’d love to have, into your life.”
February 2017 I just returned from another amazing Functional Medicine conference in Texas. It was warm there! But don’t worry, we made it back in time for the snow!!
An update from my brain (and heart) to yours: I think that our body whispers to us all the time about things it doesn’t like and about imbalances that it’s noticing. If we ignore the whispers, eventually it will yell. I think about this like a spark, that then turns into a flame, then into a fire, then an inferno. This inferno will set off a smoke detector. Essentially, this smoke detector going off is a symptom. This could be fatigue, weight gain, depression, anxiety, bloating, acne, pain, diabetes, MS, Alzheimer’s, etc. In conventional medicine, we’re taught to name the disease, blame all your symptoms on that disease, then drug it. End of story. Basically, that’s like taking the batteries out of the smoke detector without searching for and taking care of the cause. This is a problem as I GUARENTEE that if that root cause isn’t dealt with, it will set of another smoker detector, then another, then another…until there is no home left to protect.
I am realizing that my true passion as a healer is to help people connect the dots of their chronic health complaints to help get down to the root cause. From there, recommendations can be made to help HEAL your body
This involves really optimizing your lifestyle, including food (both what you are eating and what you’re not), exercise, relationship health, financial health, and level of fun just to name a few! It’s not the same as throwing a quick “fix” pill into your system. It takes commitment and dedication. But, hey! I think you’re worth it.
Genetics and trauma (both physical and mental) play a part in our current health, but there are LOTs of things that can be changed to get you to THRIVE in your life, not just survive. You have a choice, do you want to be a victim of your life, or the hero?
I think it’s important for you, as my patients, to know that this is the direction that I’m heading in. It is no longer satisfying to me to sit and figure out what changes to your medication cocktail are going to make you feel great while turning a blind eye to your lifestyle. (Spoiler: there is NO perfect cocktail of medications that will give you the life you want.) I’m not saying that change is easy; I just saying that it’s worth it. If you are in the mindset that you’re doomed to feel miserable for the rest of your life and if you’re not interested in digging deeper in your lifestyle habits, perhaps I’m not the right doctor for you anymore.
I’m still in the early learning phases of this, but I have never been so inspired to learn as I am right now. Jennie and I are both eagerly learning more so we can be better coaches for you.
I just want to be happy. What makes me happy is helping people to heal. You in?
January 2017 “Vulnerability is the most accurate measure of courage.” ~ Brené Brown ~ check out brenebrown.com, especially her videos
Brené Brown is a researcher out of the University of Houston who studies shame and vulnerability. Light and fun topics right? The work that this woman has done has changed my life. I feel like I can understand myself much better and those around me. She has many posts online, books, CDs and videos. WATCH/READ/LISTEN TO THEM ALL!! J
Here’s my summary of her work: Human beings are hardwired for connection. Shame is the fear of not being connected; of not belonging. Anyone who is capable of connecting is at risk of feeling shame (different sides of the same coin). The feeling of shame is protective- a baby who does not connect with his or her parents isn’t going to be fed. Therefore, being able to connect is a matter of life or death. Feeling shame is the same as feeling trauma. Think about slamming on your brakes going 60mph to avoid a deer. The same hormones are released in the car and when shame has been triggered.
We all have different shame triggers. Although once shame has been triggered, it feels in all of us. Dr. Brown talks about our triggers as releasing “shame gremlins”. We all have these shame gremlins. I imagine them as being like those little devils and angels living on your shoulders…except they’re 2 gremlins. When you feel shame, one of the gremlins will say, “See, I told you that you weren’t good enough.” If you’re able to silence that one, then the second one will come back with the message, “So, who do you think you are? Well, when you fail, I’ll be right here to tell you I told you so.” Most people are familiar with these messages, and if you’re like me, you thought you were all alone with these thoughts. The way you know what will trigger your shame gremlins, just finish this sentence, “I will be good enough, when...” For example: I will be ok, once I’m rich enough, thin enough, smart enough, etc In our culture, what triggers our shame is gender based. Women, in general, are supposed to be able to do it all, do it perfectly, and look good doing it. Being held to this ridiculous standard is going to be at the base of many women’s shame triggers. Men, in general, are not allowed to be perceived as being weak. Super unrealistic as well.
When someone’s shame has been triggered; when the shame gremlins are screaming in their ears, they have walked into a shame swamp. Remember, the body interprets being in a shame swamp as a life or death situation. It triggers all your stress hormones including cortisol (see last month’s newsletter). When someone is stuck in the middle of a shame swamp there are 3 ways people are going to react. They will: 1. Get angry 2. Shut down 3. People please The problem with all of these options, they are reactions. They are not logical well thought out actions. They are not authentic. So, anyone with an anger issue, actually has a shame issue. Anyone who just shuts down and disappears in actuality, emotionally or by getting lost in facebook or in an alcoholic beverage, etc, has a shame issue. Anyone who promises too much in an unrealistic amount of time, has a shame issue (this is my go to reaction).
So how do you get out of the shame swamp? 1. Spend some time realizing what your shame triggers are. Really get to know your shame gremlins (whose voice do they have? Often the messages were meant to protect you at one point in your life. It just isn’t helpful for you anymore or misguided) 2. Recognize what your reactions to the shame gremlins are (do you get angry, shut down or people please? All 3?) 3. Recognize when you’re lost in the middle of a shame swamp 4. Reach out to someone who has earned the right to hear your story; someone you trust; someone who understands shame. (It helps to have these conversations with people before you’re waist deep in the swamp. The conversations I’ve had are, “Hey I’m going to call you when I realize I’m in a shame swamp. I just need you to remind me that I’m ok even though I’m not perfect. I need you to tell me how you’ve had similar situations so I know I’m not alone.” 5. Honestly share with this person what triggered this shame gremlin attack 6. If you’re the trusted person, listen gently and think about how it would feel to be in that situation and if appropriate, honestly respond with, “I know you’re scared when this happens. Guess what? ME TOO.” It’s this connection that helps to heal shame and rescue someone from the shame swamp. Empathy (“Me too”) is the antidote to shame.
December 2016 FEELING STRESSED?!! Keep on reading Modified article by Lissa Rankin “10 Fun Ways To Reduce Your Cortisol Levels” From 6/27/13
The body knows how to heal itself. As I describe in my book Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself, our bodies are beautifully equipped with natural self-repair mechanisms that fight cancer, prevent infection, repair wounds, protect us from infectious agents and foreign bodies, and even affect how our genes express themselves! But here’s what most people don’t know. These natural self-repair mechanisms get deactivatedwhen your body is full of stress hormones like cortisol and epinephrine in “fight-or-flight” mode.
Makes sense. When your amygdala, the not-so-smart part of your brain that reacts to threats by tripping off the “fight-or-flight” stress response, signals the warning alarm, your body focuses all its attention on fighting and fleeing. Blood flow is shunted to your large muscle groups (away from your digestive tract), your heart rate increases, your blood pressure goes up, and your body is on red alert. When your amygdala thinks you’re about to get eaten by a mountain lion, the body isn’t worried about preventive maintenance and the body’s self-repair operations halt until the threat is over.
But in modern day life, our warning alarms are ringing at least 50 times per day, flooding our bodies with cortisol and putting us at risk of illness. Your amygdala can’t tell the difference between a real threat to life and limb, like getting chased by a mountain lion, and a perceived threat, like fear of losing your job, worry that your loved one will leave you, or even anger that someone spilled red wine on your white carpet.
The good news is that it’s easy to shift the body into the opposite of the stress response into the relaxation response, and when this happens, your cortisol levels drop and your body’s self-repair mechanisms get back to work doing what they do best – healing you. All of the following techniques have been scientifically proven to activate relaxation responses and return your self-repair mechanisms back to optimal operation. 10 Fun Ways To Reduce Cortisol Levels1. Meditate. All forms of meditation activate the relaxation response. Try downloading the free Self-Healing Kit I created, which comes equipped with a self-healing guided meditation known to activate the relaxation response at MindOverMedicineBook.com. 2. Laugh more! In his bestselling book The Anatomy Of An Illness, Norman Cousins tells the story of how he cured himself from the debilitating condition ankylosing spondylitis by laughing along with Marx Brothers movies. He wrote, “I made the joyous discovery that ten minutes of genuine belly laughter had an anesthetic effect and would give me at least two hours of pain-free sleep. When the pain-killing effect of the laughter wore off, we would switch on the motion picture projector again and not infrequently, it would lead to another pain-free interval.” 3. Play with animals. Snuggling with our pets fills us with oxytocin, endorphins, and other healing hormones that support the body’s self-healing mechanisms. This is why pet therapy can be so effective, both mentally and physically. 4. Give generously. When Cami Walker was diagnosed with debilitating multiple sclerosis, conventional medicine had very little to offer. Then a South African medicine woman suggested that, instead of focusing on herself, she needed to shift towards thinking more about others. The medicine woman wrote Cami a prescription – Give 29 gifts in 29 days. So she did. And as if by magic, her MS symptoms started to diminish. How? Because giving activates relaxation responses, which bolster the body’s natural self-repair mechanisms. 5. Express yourself creatively. Creative expression releases endorphins and other feel-good neurotransmitters, reduces depression and anxiety, improves your immune function, relieves physical pain, and activates the parasympathetic nervous system, thereby lowering your heart rate, decreasing your blood pressure, slowing down your breathing, and lowering cortisol. 6. Practice yoga, tai chi, Qigong, or dance forms like Gabrielle Roth’s 5 Rhythms – or get a massage. All of these modalities, which combine the benefits of exercise and meditation, steep you in healing hormones and have been proven to effectively drop cortisol levels and improve your body’s ability to heal itself. Or get a massage, the ultimate relaxation response activator. A nurturing massage not only relaxes your muscles, it relaxes your nervous system and kicks those self-healing mechanisms into high gear. 7. Get it on. Those with healthy sex lives live longer, have a lower risk of heart disease and stroke, get less breast cancer, enjoy the benefits of stronger immune systems, sleep better, appear more youthful, enjoy improved fitness, have enhanced fertility, get relief from chronic pain, experience fewer migraines, suffer from less depression, and enjoy an improved quality of life. Oh – and their cortisol levels are lower! 8. Pray or attend services as part of a spiritual community. Those who attend religious services live up to 14 years longer than those who don’t, but don’t go to church if it’s not in alignment with your authentic beliefs. Find – or create – your own spiritual tribe, and enjoy the hormonal benefits of gathering together with the intention of loving, healing, and lifting the vibration of each other and the planet. Your nervous system – and your body – will thank you. 9. Alleviate your loneliness. Lonely people have twice the rate of heart disease as people who aren’t lonely. In fact, loneliness researchers suggest that alleviating your loneliness is more important to a healthy lifestyle than quitting smoking or starting to exercise. 10. Be brave enough to take radical action in order to reduce your stress responses. Ask yourself, “What does my body need in order to heal?” If your intuition says, “You have to quit that soul-sucking job” or “You’ve got to get out of that abusive relationship,” listen up. You’ve just written The Prescription for yourself. Too scared to take a leap of faith? As my friend and co-conspirator at the Whole Health Medicine Institute says, “If you want big miracles, you have to take big risks. If you’re wanting to take smaller risks, you’ll have to accept smaller miracles.”
November 2016 SNOT HEAD!! (I mean that in the nicest way possible) Head congestion is a very common problem this time of year. I thought I’d share my thoughts about snot. Personally, I can deal with feeling rotten a whole lot better if I understand why.
So, in our face we have 8 sinuses. 2 in our forehead (frontal), 2 in our cheeks (maxillary) and 2 behind each eye (the sphenoid and ethmoids). When we’re not sick, those sinuses make a little mucous that then drains into the nose and down the back of the throat, keeping everything nice and moist.
When we get sick with anything that produces more mucous (ie, a virus, allergies, etc), then the sinuses make a lot more mucous AND the teeny tiny sinus passage ways become congested. This makes it so the sinuses can’t drain. Because they’re not draining, pressure builds up and that’s when you wish your face would explode to get some relief. At this point, you’ll be miserable, but it’s congestion, not necessarily an infection.
The thing about fluid that gets stagnant (meaning- not moving), it is much more likely to get infected. So mucous in a sinus, urine in a bladder, a puddle outside- if the fluid doesn’t move, it will start to grow stuff. So the key, as I see it, is to keep the snot moving! I’m much more worried about someone having a sinus infection if they are stuffy vs if they’re runny.
Here is another interesting fact about mucous- the longer it’s sitting around, the thicker it gets and the more colorful it becomes. So “baby” mucous is the clear drippy stuff. Then it turns white, then yellow, then green, then brown, getting thicker the whole time. SO the color of the mucous means that it’s pretty thick mucous that has been sitting around which increases the risk of it being INFECTED. (To be clear, not all green mucous is infected. It just indicates that it’s stagnant and has a higher risk of becoming infected.)
This mucous likes to hang out in the nasal passageways and especially just about your soft palate. This is also where your ears drain. So, when you have head congestion, this is why your ears are also full. There’s a big mucous ball clogging them. Then this mucous can drip down the back of your throat causing post nasal drip which can cause a sore throat, horrible breath and cough. Ahhhh snot!! So, what to do: My goal of any snot head problem is to loosen up the snot.
Nasal saline (ie. Simply Saline)- use isotonic/0.9%/normal saline (look at the active ingredients). Don’t use hypertonic solution- this has extra salt and can be very uncomfortable to use. Squirt it in each nostril. Plug the nose so it doesn’t drip out. Then tip your head upside down. Or lay your head off the edge of you bed extending the head backwards. It’s going to feel weird, kind of like jumping into a swimming pool and getting the water up your nose. But man! The stuff you’ll be able to blow or cough out will be worth it! Do this 17,000,000 times/day.
Use plain Guaifenesin (ie. Mucinex blue box). This helps to loosen mucous. The way it works is to take fluid from your body and puts it into the mucous. So it’s super important to hydrate!
Hydrate!! Your goal is to be peeing clear. If there’s any yellow color to it (unless you’re taking certain vits), go get a drink of water, soup, juice, etc.
AVOID decongestants (ie Sudafed, any cold medicine that says sinus relief, Dayquil, etc). Really. In my experience, decongestants help congestion by thickening up the mucous. This helps you to breathe through your nose easier, but it makes the mucous that is still in the sinuses a thick mucous plug. Also, decongestants can make some people jittery and cotton mouthed.
I highly recommend starting the nasal saline, guaifenesin and fluids at the very moment when you feel like you’re coming down with something. Keeping the mucous moving is so super important!!!!!
If an antibiotic is needed, CONTINUE to do steps 1, 2 and 3. It will help alleviate the congestion which will help you to clear the infection.
Gratitude
I absolutely need to make it known that so many people have helped me to get to this point (both in my career and in my life). I am a truly blessed individual to be surrounded by angels and fairy godmothers. Some help me to dream. Some help me to be grounded. Others hold up mirrors for me. I am appreciative beyond words. I will be putting more details in this one as time goes on.
To those of you who have helped, please accept this as a sincere thank you. I love you, man!!
The Smoke Detector
Picture this- a smoke detector going off. Man! that thing is scary and pretty annoying. You can take the batteries out to quiet it. Sometimes silencing it is necessary, but only long enough to do a more thorough evaluation. It's vitally important to find out where the smoke is coming from. Where is the fire? Sometimes the source of the fire can't be found. Sometimes the batteries just need to be changed. But if there is a fire somewhere in the house, then a smoke detector will eventually go off again, either in the same room or somewhere else.
Now, in case you didn't get it...the smoke detector going off is a symptom. Taking out the batteries is like throwing a pill at the problem. Necessary sometimes, but only part of the whole healing picture. You deserve to have all of your rooms evaluated if you want. You deserve to be paid attention to.
Let us take the time to go through each and every one of your rooms (if you want!) to help you get to the root of your problems, not just silence the symptoms!!
Healing Tree
Imagine a big tree. A healing tree. All the limbs of the tree are are different healing modalities- Western allopathic medicine (that's what us MD's do), Osteopathic medicine (what DOs do), meditation, acupuncture, chiropractic medicine, energy healing, Ayurveda, etc. I am not arrogant enough to think that any one limb will work for everyone or that all limbs need to used by everyone. I admit that I do not understand all the other limbs, but I do believe that it's important for an individual to find out what is the best choice for him or herself. I'm open to learning and exploring.
Trail Guide
I used to think that doctors were human mechanics; that we are supposed to learn how to fix people. A few years ago, I was feeling really burned out because I wasn't fixing anyone. Working through this frustration with the help of many teachers has allowed me to grow very much. I now realize that NO ONE is broken, so there is nothing to fix. AND if anything needs to change for a person, then it needs to come from that person. I CANNOT do the changing for anyone. The only thing I can do is to help empower people to heal themselves!!
I now think of myself as a trail guide or a travel companion. I have some knowledge that can help you on your journey, but more than anything I honor where you are on your path. If you want to take my advice, great!, but know that it comes with no guarantee. You are also free to take any path that feels right for you. I know that sometimes it may not be the most "supposed to" path, but it is always YOUR choice. You might fall off a cliff or you might find the most beautiful sight you've ever seen. I will be there on the path if you choose to find me again. No judgement. I will, however, NOT carry you. You need to walk this journey by yourself. This is the only way for you to build confidence, muscles and respect for yourself. Just be aware, I'm a goofball and love singing songs while on my journey!